Too Superstitious

You know the thing that once you do that, your life is complete. I have been practicing law for 17 years, but I have never had a jury trial. I've been close, I've had lots of trials with the judge deciding the facts, but for whatever reason, no jury trials. I'm close to having a jury trial again. The case is really silly. I'm surprised the Plaintiff hasn't dropped the whole thing (and they still might). Unfortunately, when you go 17 years without a jury trial, you build it up in your head, so that what actually occurs can never satisfy the myth it has become. I was drafting my opening statement in my head--after 20 minutes I realized, the court probably won't let me talk that long and since my client is really a peripheral defendant, I might not get to talk at all. I take that back--the court has to let me talk, but I should really use Vinny's opening statement from "My Cousin Vinny"--"Good morning, everything that guy said is crap." [I think I watch too much tv.]

So what's the superstitious part you may ask. I've also never been in the hospital before (except for being born I guess). 47 years old and never broken a limb, no spiking fevers, no emergency room visits. But my doctor wants me to have surgery and stay in the hospital for two days. This would happen shortly after my scheduled jury trial. People die in hospitals. What if I have a jury trial and then my ticket is up and here I am going to a hospital right after that.

So I either get out of the jury trial, but there's always a next time (unless I quit practicing law that is) or I don't go to the hospital, but then what's to stop a bus from running me over. Oye.

As I said, way too superstitious. I recently met a guy on a plane and we started talking. He told me that he was an insurance adjuster and that he just finished closing his 348th claim in New Orleans. Then he said, you know we lost 8 people in New Orleans. And I said, lost as in, they quit and he said, no lost as in, they died. One fell off a roof inspecting the property and 7 were shot and killed by insureds. Then he told me about one incident that happened to him. He asked the insured if he had read his policy, no (they never do), but the insured is sure he is covered for everything. In fact, his policy covers wind damage, but not flood. So the insurance adjuster (we'll call him Ted, because I forgot his name) says you can see the six foot water line all around the house and everything is ruined, but Ted can only cover damage caused by wind, so he tells the insured--show me the cracks that caused the damage. They go around the whole house and only find one crack in the utility room, so Ted writes down that one room is a total loss, but he has to tell the insured that the insurance company can only pay for that one room. So Ted is writing it up and the insured comes back with a gun and points it him. So Ted, calm as anything says, wait just a minute I have to write up my notes (WHILE THE OTHER GUY IS POINTING A GUN AT HIM). The guy waits and finally Ted looks up and says "I'm going to help you cover this claim--there's lots of help from the government, fema, guarenteed loans, etc." and the guy says, "How are you going to help me, if you are dead." and Ted says "My aunts live in New Orleans--I know how things work." and the guys says "but you'll be dead" and Ted says "That's right, but I'll be here in spirit, right next to you the whole way and I'm going to solve your problems--don't you worry." So Ted says that he goes on a little more about how he's going to come back in the afterlife and work with the guy to solve his problems. Finally the guy throws down his gun and tells Ted, he's crazy and walks away. Superstition can be a useful tool.

I guess I'll need to bring garlic to the hospital with me. That should do it. [And be super careful around buses, but that goes without saying.]

"I've got good news."

This is a message that I received this morning. The good news is that I'm fired--well, fired is too strong a word--laid off. My class has too small an enrollment, so they are going to combine the classes and give my class to the other teacher at the other High School. I did ask for this. Of course I asked for it last year when I had the awful class that I hated--not this year when I have simply lovely students who all want to be lawyers. Oh well. More time to practice the piano.

I Am a Good Listener

I could listen to myself all day. That's a joke that I found in my Toastmaster magazine. So apropos, I needed to share. The little dictionary that I keep next to my computer says that "apropos" is from the French, but doesn't it sound like it should be Latin? How come people in Latin America speak Spanish, but I digress. I got a new Law vocabulary text book that was hidden in a closet in the career center. On the inside front and back cover are latin terms used in Law. I had no idea that I knew so much Latin and I can pronounce them all too. I was quite impressed with myself. I went so far as to muse that I could probably even use these terms in poetry since I was so familiar with their connotations, but maybe not. Real poetry is a lot of work. Sometimes I sit down and read Emily Dickenson. I can't believe that she lived so long ago--her stuff seems so apropos.

My doctor told me that I am going to start menopause early, like right away. [Why is the word "men" in menopause--it's pronouced "met", so why isn't it metopause--what kind of a crazy mixed up problem are doctors trying to create here.] So I'm trying to prepare for mood swings and irrational behavior--I hate being irrational. But how will I be able to tell I'm being irrational, if I am the subject. Can a subject judge herself? Then I remembered that I just have to question, is it me or is it the hormones--I have a much better sense of humor than my hormones, so I'm sure I'll be able to tell. By the way, all you well meaning people who wish to help me discern--do it and die. No court would hold me accountable for such a mercy killing--you being too stupid to live and all. [Maybe my hormones are a little funny too, oye.]

Count Your Blessings

I read an article last night about a new book called "Secrets" and the article said decribed what I learned in high school about the theory of prayer--thank God for what you have, then thank God for what you want as though you have already received it, etc. The lady writing the article was plenty sceptical of the book, but she gave it a try and came up with three wishes. She visualized and said thank you and banished negative energy and built up positive energy. At the end of two weeks, she hadn't gotten a single one of her wishes despite a valiant effort. However, when she sat down to count her blessings, she realized that she had much more than she realized and what she had was better than her wishes.

So it's friday morning--I have a bunch of crap to do at work--I'm already late--I'm working the concession stand tonight, so that's hours on my feet--a long time before I can go home and relax--I'm dragging myself to the car and from the car to the office, when I think 'why don't I try to count my blessings." I have the best job in the world--I'm the boss. I do my work on my own schedule. I can come in at 10 a.m. and no one is going to even raise an eyebrow--they're happy I showed up at all. I'm teaching a class again this semester and the kids are great. Caitlyn just came by to say hi--she is soo cute. I have a new regular doctor and I think I like her. I actually went to the gym this morning--today is the first day of the rest of my good intentions. And it's Friday--that's chocolate chip cookie day. What a great day!

Tennis All the Time

Finally having full coverage on tv is almost as big a time committment as going in person. I just got back from court, tuned into the internet site for the US Open in time to watch the match point score for Kuznetsova go up. I really thought Szavay was going to give her more of a fight. Last night was very sad. First my tape from the evening (because I was at the toastmasters) quit after just two hours[--there is no button to change to a longer play--it seems like what ever the last time of the tape was, that's what it goes in as]. But I wasn't worried--it is unlikely that Henin and Serena played longer than two hours. I was really lucky to see that Nadal was still playing at 9:30, so I settled in to watch that match. OMG, poor Nadal. Even sick as a dog, he played great. He looked so much worse than Berdych, but he just kept playing. I knew that Ferrer was going to be trouble--he's been playing really well. Well, I'd like to see a Djokovic v. Federer match anyway.

Then after the heartbreak of biding Nadal adieu, I put in my tape of the beginning of the evening matches. I was so careful not to listen to the news. It started with the end of the Djokovic match. That's nice I thought--I haven't seen him play much. But it was getting pretty late, so I hit fast forward...for a long time...finally, I got to Serena and Justine. I was falling asleep, but I tried to keep up. Serena was a little off and Justine was playing really well, but Serena was keeping in it pretty good. The first set was very close...then the tape ended. AAAHHHH.

Barely able to keep my eyes open I raced to my computer to pull up the US open site. Serena lost 6-1 in the second set--yea, I didn't miss a thing.

Davydenko and Haas are getting ready to play. I have an appointment at 1:30 and then I'm going home to watch some tennis. Tonight is a biggie--Federer v. Roddick, and Venus v. Jankovic. I really like Jankovic, but Venus owns my heart. I really like Roddick too, but Federer would have to have the flu and bad luck to lose.

The Bryans lost, so doubles hold no meaning to me, which means after today, the big matches are fewer and farther apart--a much more manageable schedule (and in the comfort of my home with no direct sunlight--you can't beat that with a stick.)