Tall Tale

We are having a tall tale contest at toastmasters.  I got up in the middle of the night and turned on the microphone in my iphone and taped a tall tale.  The cool part is that the app actually times the speech, the bad part is that the speech is supposed to be 3 to 5 minutes and of course it was 10 minutes.  I'll have to time this written version--I left out some parts, like how Bob Dylans car broke down and the million questions that Adam had for him that raced through his mind, while he listened to Poncho disparage the Chilaen government.  Oh well,

Enjoy:

So my nephew, Adam moved to Australia last January.  About a month after he moved there, he found out about a Bob Dylan concert at a festival that was out in the middle of nowhere, but he could take the train there.  He couldn't pass up a chance to see Bob Dylan, so he went by himself on the train and walked the mile or so to the festival grounds.  It was a hot day (our winter is their summer) and Adam had on shorts and tee shirt.  He had a great time at the festival, but he wanted to be in front for the main event--the Bob Dylan concert, so he camped out at the stage that Dylan would be playing at.  Near the time for the beginning of the concert it started to rain--hard.  It poured, but they put up very large tents near the stage and Adam was near the front, under the tents.

The concert was fantastic, but the thing about it was that Bob Dylan smiled the whole time.  Now if you know anything about Bob Dylan you know that this is rather unusual--Bob Dylan is known for mumbling.  He always looks kind of morose, kind of sad, kind of out of it.  So for him to smile and look like he was really enjoying himself was so excellant.  Adam loved it.

After the concert, Adam stayed til the very end and by the time he walked back to the train station, he had missed the last train.  He looked around for an all night diner or even a hotel, but there was nothing.  It was pretty desolate.  There was an awning at the dinky train station, so Adam sat down to wait for the first train the next day at 6:00 a.m.  By now, it was almost 2 a.m. and pretty cold.  Adam had an extra tee shirt, so he drapped it over his knees to try to get warm.

Adam wasn't there long, when a car drove up.  The guy rolled down his window and asked Adam "Are you ok?"  Adam said, "I'm fine, I'm just waiting for the next train at 6:00 a.m."  The guy said "You don't look fine--it is cold and raining, I think you better come with me to my house to wait."  Adam said, "No, I'm fine--I'll be just fine here."  The guy got out of his car and said, "My name is Poncho.  I really think that you better come with me.  I picked up this other guy who was stranded on the road. I have an alarm clock--you can sleep on my couch and I'll get you guys up in time and bring you back to the train station." 

Now Poncho was not even five feet tall and a little older.  Adam is almost six feet tall, so Adam was more than a head taller than Poncho.  Well Adam is a little leary about getting into the car with this guy, but he figures he can take him if he has to and he is cold, so he gets in the back seat that Poncho is holding open.  When Adam gets in the car, he sees the other guy that Poncho picked up sitting in the front seat.  The guy seems kind of small and older and he's kind of hiding his head, but Adam sees that it is Bob Dylan.  "Bob Dylan!" Adam says really surprised.  Poncho is getting back into the car and he says "Oh, good you guys know each other."  Adam realizes two things right away:  Poncho doesn't know who Bob Dylan is and Bob Dylan doesn't seem to want to be recognized.  Well Adam doesn't want to bother Bob Dylan and he's pretty happy to be in a warm car, so he keeps him mouth shut.

Poncho on the other hand, clearly loves having an audience and starts to tell them all about himself.  He's from Chile--he's been in Australia for many years because the government of Chile is corrupt and a bunch of crooks.  He goes on and on and looks to Adam and Bob Dylan to agree with him.  They get to Poncho's house, which is a small step up from a one room shack--there's two rooms.  Poncho asks them if they would like something to eat and Bob Dylan asks for a phone.  Poncho says, "no, I only have one for emergencies and it's not hooked up."  Poncho is still talking and talking about how much he hates the government of Chile, and he starts to make tomatoe soup.  Adam figures that he's pretty hungry, so he's happy to say yes to the offered tomatoe soup and they all sit down.  Adam is sitting there trying to work up his courage to talk to Bob Dylan.  Finally Adam says "Mr. Dylan, I don't want to bother you, but I'm really curious, why were you smiling through your whole concert tonight?"  At that Poncho suddenly says "Bob Dylan, the Bob Dylan, you are Bob Dylan--oh my goodness, I had no idea--you are the famous Bob Dylan?"  Bob Dylan kind of mumbled, "Yes."  "Why didn't you say so," says Poncho.  "You want a phone--I'll get my emergency phone."  With that Poncho goes to a closet and on the top shelf he pulls down a very old rotary phone.  He takes it out on the front porch and from the corner, he pulls down a cord and plugs in the phone.  Bob Dylan makes a call and minutes later a big black car pulls up in front and Bob Dylan leaves.  As he leaves, Poncho and Adam are standing on the porch and Bob Dylan looks back, smiles at them and makes a peace sign and then he's gone.  Poncho and Adam look at each other and say "wow".  Then Poncho says, "Well, I'm really tired.  I'll set the alarm clock and take you to the train at 5:30, ok?"  "Thanks man," says Adam, and Poncho goes in to bed.  Adam stands on the porch looking out at the vast night, in the middle of nowhere and says to himself "I'm in Australia. I just ate tomatoe soup with Poncho and Bob Dylan.  The world is upside down.  It's awesome!"